Addiction

This is a very powerful and controlling aspect of life. Addiction can be in a vast array of forms. From addiction to foods, activities, alcohol, behavioral, sex, drugs, the list can go on. Many of us have one or possibly more addictive traits. Some may view their addiction as positive, such as being addictive to exercise and staying in shape.

For many, the addiction is compulsive, habit-forming, filling a void and can take control of your life.  It can be defined as a disease in nature. So what is your addiction?

I have realized over the years, I have an addictive nature. It varies on mood, age, day of the week. When the addiction gets out of control, I know it is wrong, yet continue to pursue it. It’s a lack of control yet trying to find control.

The past few years, the addiction I have allowed to control my life is alcohol.  Long days at work, rushing home to tend to family, my mind lingers for the moment I can open a bottle of wine and enjoy that numbing feeling of drowning out the day. I have learned from speaking with so many friends and colleagues they experience the same sense of gratification at the end of the day with that glass, usually several, of happiness. But is it really calming us down, does this magical potion heal the issues of our day?

I realized I was turning to a bottle as my salvation for the day. Then the next day I would feel exhausted, dehydrated, irritated, and looking in the mirror, I was not happy with myself. So why did I continue this routine for years and impact my health, happiness and well-being? That magical bottle was destroying me more each day. I was drowning in my addiction, and affecting so many people and circumstances in my life.

So, it’s been four days and I feel and look better. But I still dream to have that drink at the end of the day.  I decided to remove the bottles from my home to keep out the addiction as I build up my strength. I realized I needed to turn to my faith to help me through each days battle. I needed God in my life to guide me and help me overcome this addiction. I woke up and said I quit, because I love God more!

I will continue this journey of healing and hope some of you, who can relate, will want to join me. I am here to listen (ecouter).

 

 

 

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